Pairing: FemShep/Thane & FemShep/Kaidan
Summary: Takes place directly following the Cerberus Citadel Coup attempt. My Shep #2 (who romanced Kaidan in ME1, then fell head-over-heals for Thane in ME2). This one's got the colonist, soul survivor background (so she's no stranger to loss).
Shepard let her words sink in, stepping outside the moment as something cold blew across her thoughts.
She'd wanted to take him back to the pre-fab home she'd left behind on Intai'sei. She could see them there, bathing in the heat. Someplace arid. "A desert," he'd said, hoping to hold back the inevitable. Just a few stolen days, to just love and be.
But time had run out. Too much had stood in the way of happily ever after.
The pain of his absence fed on itself as her reeling mind registered the permanency, then, quickly, blocked the agony, numbing it out.
Every time she looked back on his face and tried to remember, she would lose a slice of her life. Soft lips and whispers, clutching at the memories of the moments that were far too few. The wonder of him, and the impact he'd made in so short a time.
It would be over, someday. It had to be. A soft landing awaited them both, destination set to a place she'd never again go. No regrets, leaving nothing behind.
Now, standing outside Normandy's airlock, looking up into dark brown eyes, she felt her heart break for the second time that day as she sent Kaidan away. She was finished losing the people she loved.
A/N: Gah, I haven't even gotten to this part yet, but just knowing it's going to happen is making me sick. Losing Thane and then chosing to War-Asset Kaidan directly after is going to suck like woah. I'm trying to get into the mindset of "she doesn't want to lose him, too", but I'm also, really, just being a pill about wanting this Shep to end up with Thane
(or *cough* James *cough*) or ALONE. Sometimes, when I write, it's just me trying to work out my issues with things that happen in the game. Forgive me if it came out jumbled, or looks more like poetry than fic. I also kind of place some of the blame for this on link , which just makes me FEEL when I look at it.